Weird things I wonder about: The Snake Handlers Edition

Maybe it's because I didn't have any religious upbringing at all, but there are so many aspects of faith and worship that fascinate me..especially churches and sects that are way outside the norm. A case in point would be the Church of God with Signs Following, a.k.a., snake handlers. Thanks to the wonder of the Internet, I found quite a few helpful links regarding this sect (or whatever you call it). Of course there's your standard Wikipedia entry...which is very comprehensive and even gives a listing of churches (there's one in Ft.Wayne...not that I'm going to go and disrupt their services or anything...come to think of it, what exactly could I do that would be all that disruptive to people who handle snakes, speak in tongues, and drink strychnine?). I particularly liked this site...lots of pictures, video and music. A smorgasbord of information regarding all your snake handling questions.

Not that they're related, but in case you didn't have to read it in high school or college, check out Jonathan Edwards' "Sinners In The Hands of An Angry God". I searched on photobucket for an appropriate picture to accompany it, and all that came up was this delightful drawing. It's nice to see that other people wasted valuable class time pondering their own damnation. Fun fun fun...and sure to brighten any one's day.

Also..is it just me or does the balding gentlemen in the picture at the beginning of this entry kind of resemble Hunter S Thompson? Yeah, I thought it was just me.

There is something wrong with me

If there's something wrong with you, too, you might be interested in this site. Find the graves of the famous and...I don't know, dance around like a wild injun? If I ever make it to Texas again, I will be visiting Bill...and here's why.

Crazy4Cult

I am yet again stealing a link from Kevin Smith...but these are just too damn cool to not be seen (I'm going to make a wild guess that more people look at Kevin Smith's myspace page than my blog....I know, it's a stretch, but...yeah).


We had ourselves a kick ass weekend...Went to Indy and hooked up with Johnny and Stef (who we haven't seen since my baby shower) and invaded Dave's house. We are either A.)old fogies or B.)broke, because all we did was drink and sit out on Dave's porch. And laugh. A lot. I forgot what it's like to hang out with people who you can't embarrass, disgust, and are totally comfortable with. I seriously think we might just be the five funniest people on the planet.

I love this man

I wish I could have found a better picture, but, alas, I am lazy. Anyhoo, check out Mr.Bridges official website...it includes his own photography, some awesome links, and is quite nifty looking.

I am bored

So I thought I'd post this photo of Tom Waits from "The Outsiders". I'm not ashamed to admit it (well, not all that ashamed) but I rushed out when the new special edition of this movie came out on DVD and bought it. Ah, Ponyboy...although I'd have to say, for my money, Matt Dillion is the main attraction. Ah, Dallas Winston...unfortunately for me, after viewing this movie approximately 90 million times while growing up, I fear I may have developed a horrible "bad boy" fixation, which lead me to date some really..well, good looking bad boys who treated me like dirt. I blame you, Dallas Winston! Anyway...isn't it bizarre that Tom Waits was in this movie? His character's name was Buck, and if I wasn't too lazy, I'd get up and find the book and tell you the last name as well, but...what with being on my third beer (another drunken blog, yay!) and all...Yeah.

I'm beginning to think this whole blogging thing may not be for me...I think I'm essentially a boring person who really has nothing interesting to say, other than waxing rhapsodic about "The Outsiders" and other retarded shit. I'm sure there's a vast internet movement toward lame Midwestern moms who bitch about their lives and give cute little anecdotes about pop culture...and then go on and on about how they don't think they should be blogging in the first place...AGH!

Oh well. I thought this was funny.... I'll shut up now.

"And I don't wanna live this life"

I got every question right except for the second one. Man, did I read the crap out of this book...


Oh, and I got eight right on this quiz....don't know whether to be proud of that or not.

I need to go to bed

Unfortunately, my family's not all that subversive, so I really can't think of any relative who's FBI file would either be interesting or even exisit. But maybe you're luckier than I am.

Thanks to Kevin Smith for sending me the bulletin which led me to his blog which led me to this picture which is an add for some cult movie dealy he's hosting in LA which I can't go to because I am 1.)lame and 2.)not in LA. I am also possibly lame for having Kevin Smith as a myspace friend, but damnit, he writes funny blogs and I like his movies (didn't see "Jersey Girl"...no, I'm not that lame).

The link, not the picture...

Is this really Jim? It looks like him, and he would have been in Florida at the time...the first time he "speaks", it's obviously dubbed, but the second time....Hmmm. And I think I saw him briefly expose himself..but that could have been mass hysteria (can you have mass hysteria by yourself?). Either way, those bastards should let him into college.

Create your own conspiracy theory!

It's kind of like playing Mad Libs. Here's mine, complete with horrible grammatical errors (I kind of think they add to it).

"What They Don't Want You to Know

In order to understand evolution you need to realize that everything is controlled by a clog dancers made up of Icelandic people with help from Girl Scouts.The conspiracy first started during the war of 1812 in Daleville. They have been responsible for many events throughout history, including Cat stevens' changing his name.
Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by opening a new container when there's still some in the old container.
They want to rolling a drunk Ann Coulter and imprison resisters in Hell using rik shaws.
In order to prepare for this, we all must pooping. Since the media is controlled by Manfred Mann we should get our information from George Bush."

Ha ha, I am so funny. This is pretty much a Mad lib generator (even though they're not "mad"...they're "CRAZY"!!). It's kind of fun, even if you're like me and can't remember what a transitive verb is. Here's an example of me being oh so clever.

"Love Letter

Dear Sweetheart,
I lay awake all renaissance thinking of you, your funky smile, and our tryst in the valley. Lustfully, I recall our meeting, how my heart plummeted with arrogance when I first saw you. How fruity you looked in that red suspenders and those two tangy bonnets on your nostrils!
I cherished every moment we were together and was stanky when our date came to a close. I can't say how zestfully I regret spilling pee on your taint; you were nausea about it, however, for which I am grateful. You are so beautiful when you're nausea.
You're jewy most other times. Your eyes are like deep pools of radiator fluid, warmed in the moonlight. Your cheeks are as rosy as women. Your lips are like succulent snails. Your hair is puce like a koala on a summer's day. Your butts are two enormous octagons of pain.
I can't wait to hiss with you again. Write soon.
Arrogantly,
Your Friend"

"Your butts are two enormous octagons of pain"..hee hee!

Is this for real?

And really, it's disturbing either way. So much of it is disturbing, it's hard to pick out just one thing that stands out...so we'll start with the fact the site is sponsored by these guys.

I have no idea what this says...

...but the pictures are purty.